Escort Trumpresstrial Service!

What happens in Vegas, doesn’t stay in Vegas! Lovely and I made our first trip to Las Vegas and also north along the Extraterrestrial Highway which has many strange and bizarre sites, not least of which is ET Fresh Jerky that had this Alien Trump fortune teller machine that, in combination with a GREAT parody at the Erotic Heritage Museum in Vegas, sparked this sexcapade! Not the usual type of Sin City escort service!

The Black Mailbox is a place where UFO enthusiasts leave messages and drinks in hopes of communication with aliens in Area 51.

Hey you! It’s Alien Trump! You want grab an alien by the P?

Alien pussy or penis, it doesn’t matter, just wash your hands. Lots of people say I have tiny hands, but for aliens they’re huge. Huge! My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well documented, are various other parts of my body.

You know like Nick or Nicolette here? My daughter, Nicolette. She’s 6 feet tall, she’s got the best body.

If Nicolette weren’t my daughter, perhaps I would be dating her.

Area 51. Very secret government base. Very secret. Has a Black Mailbox where you can talk to aliens.

It’s so true. I’m Alien President so I know these things. Not illegal aliens, I’m talking about real aliens. A lot of people don’t know that.

You know who’s one of the great beauties of the world, according to everybody? Marilyn Monroe. She’s an alien. It’s true. It’s so true.

I moved on her actually. You know she was down on Palm Beach. I moved on her and I failed. I’ll admit it. I did try and fuck her. She was married.

Anyway you go to the Alien Research Center. It’s right past the ET sign, it’s like the Welcome to Las Vegas sign, but more bigly!

Outside talk to Covfefe. I’ve known Covfefe for fifteen years. Terrific guy. Can’t miss him he’s huge. Huge!

You talk to Covfefe, tell him I sent you. You pay him 20 billion space moons. The beauty of me is that I’m rich! I look very much forward to showing my financials, because they are huge. Huge!

Then you take a shot glass with Marilyn. She’s an alien. Ren’Hahuta. Lot’s of people don’t know that. Fill it with alien tequila. Not Mexican tequila, that’s for bad hombres. But some of it, I assume, is good.

You want to grab some Penis, write the word Rrulel. That’s the alien word for dick. It’s true. I know words. I have the best words!

Leave it in the Black Mailbox and you get alien nudes. Not fake nudes like from GNN, Galaxy News Network. Real nudes!

You get an alien with a rrulel. And his rrulel will be huge. Huge! I’m hearing it’s the biggest. You won’t believe how big it is!

Then you give him the sextraterrestrial greeting. I call it the ET Jerky. Don’t even wait. And when you’re a star alien researcher, they let you do it. You can do anything….Grab them by the rrulel. You can do anything.

Lovely and I outside the Alien Research Center. I think we all know what kind of research goes on in there! A little gastronomical and anatomical!

Sinful Sunday
Wicked Wednesday


    1. nopantsendurance

      TBH it was my top spot to visit, not a gambler or partier and Vegas was very interesting to visit for the sites, it’s not really my scene. I also want to go back and see Hoover Dam and Valley of Fire


  1. LovelyBraindrops

    OMG this is funny! You all should know, NPE doesn’t say any of this when we go places; its always a new spin on our trips for me to come and see/read what must have been going on in that quiet mans head! Such a treat my friend! Hilarious!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. nopantsendurance

        Sometimes I have an idea in mind, but this one I went back through the pictures and fit a story in. We went through ET highway to the Little A’Le’Inn at night, so we visited in the next day in reverse order. But I’m certainly more of a planner in my humor, not really spontaneous!

        Liked by 1 person

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